It's 5 am and Thanks to the Dunkin Donuts Large Iced Coffee I Inhaled 6 Hours Ago, I'm Not Tired

Love my good friend Patrice over at socially awkwords for making me do this.

1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? Approximately 65. I'm serious.
2. Which is worse, failing or never trying? Never trying. Absolutely. I just wish I could put that belief into practice... story for another post
3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? Because they're often necessary to achieve the truly fabulous things in life. Also because we are too afraid to see what happens if we fail to do them. <-- this was Patrice's answer, which I agree with. But I also think that we like things that we don't do precisely because we haven't done them yet. A lot of things lose their appeal once you try them
4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done? Almost definitely. But I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing. To me, having high standards and lofty goals is half the battle of motivating myself to reach them. It's so easy to settle.
5. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? Inequality I think. But I'm not sure.
6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? Something extremely creative that requires little to no technical skills
7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? As of right now, I'm not doing much of anything. I'll keep you updated on this one, though.
8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? I would probably be a lot less afraid to fail and do more trying. I would spend a significantly smaller portion of my life thinking and a significantly greater part of my life doing things.
9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken? Almost none of it, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? Both. All the time. <-- completely agree with P here. I can't get away from either one, and sometimes it's extremely detrimental to my sanity.
11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do? Probably lose a little bit of respect for them. I can't really imagine that people I respect and admire wouldn't like my friends. But I guess if that did happen, I would point out the fact that I was friends with the person and see how they reacted. If necessary, I would remove myself from the situation. I don't think it would come to that. This reminds me that I need to stop talking about people...
12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? Listen to my parents. Yours might be dumb, but mine are always right.
13. Would you break the law to save a loved one? Probably. A lot of laws don't make sense anyway.
14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? Almost every day.
15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people? Write. And think.
16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? Because I'm really strange and also because people don't think of things the way I do...
17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back? So many things
18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? Yes. Parts of the past and a lot of senseless insecurities
19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? I would move almost anywhere because I've lived in the same place my entire life. The States list includes but is not limited to: North Carolina, Maine, California, Washington, Arizona, Vermont, and Connecticut
20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Almost never and no, but I kinda wish I did.
21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? I was thinking about this very thing this weekend! Jury's still out but tonight I'm leaning toward worried (yet pro-active) genius
22. Why are you, you? I dunno but I'm pretty thankful for it!
23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? Yes, and if I haven't been, I've made it right
24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? Losing touch with a good friend who lives right there. I've had both happen, and the former may be more difficult, but the latter is just plain sad. <--samesies
25. What are you most grateful for? My family. And my education.
26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? Whoa.. last question was so easy and this one is soooo hard.
27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first? For some people who have unwavering faith... not for me
28. Has your greatest fear ever come true? I don't really know what my greatest fear is
29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? Yes and yes, unfortunately
30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special? I had a pretty awesome childhood. I think running through the sprinklers with my cousins. We could not stop laughing.
31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? On my study abroad (Egypt, Ethiopia, Jordan, Thailand, & India) And also last week when I was swinging at the playground with my eyes closed and listening to music
32. If not now, then when? When the time is right
33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? Like Patrice, I do not know what to make of this question
34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever? Not really. Good, pleasant experience, yes. Best conversation? No
35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? I think because with love comes passion and sometimes people conflate passion with anger
36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? No
37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? Depends on if my job was satisfying and/or my dream job
38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing? More work I enjoy doing because when you do what you love, that also means less work
39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? Pretty much. Actually about 800 times before.
40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? If you've ever met me you know that when I strongly believe in something, there's a lot more than a soft glow.
41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? Have a party? I can think of probably 10 people outside of my extremely large family.
42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? Nah. Life can have richer experiences than beauty or fame if you do enough with the time you have. <-- Patrice said it better than I could have.
43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living? Reflection.
44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? If you know what's right why are you calculating risks and rewards?
45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? I'm not really afraid to make mistakes. But I guess because of unforeseeable consequences?
46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? Dance more. Among other things.
47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? I don't know that I've ever done this... Maybe that one time I woke myself up snoring?
48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? My family. Yes. Learning. Yes. Reading. Hell Yes.
49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that? Yesterday, no. Both days before, yes.
50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? I'm making them for myself, and taking the opinions of those I trust into careful consideration.